jennifer katherine @jenkshields@occult.camp

Hey what's up with pentacl.es

aaaand I think I'll maybe move along over to @jenkshields ?

I think also the aim is a massive detangling of trauma gathered throughout my life, lots of it as a result of how we/society/families etc treat gender & gender variant ppl but some of it from elsewhere as well

I think Nevada in particular made me realise that I definitely have used dissociation throughout my life as a coping strategy but that it's become a habit as well so I guess that's the main aim of this whole process: being more comfortable with myself and my body and my relationships to other people

If anyone's interested I'm essentially just trying to be aware of anxiety and dissociation and being conscious in those moments instead of disappearing. I read my dinner with andrea, Nevada, and Otros valles and keep seeking out more books by trans women, and I'm trying to journal about the whole process bc bad memory

It started kinda accidentally via reading trans fic by trans women authors & was just a big whole "oh damn" & I've been working on it since

Oh that was really lovely! I've been doing this thing where I'm trying to consciously engage with gender again bc I've dealt for so long via dissociation & I've realised it's had some other effects so that was rly good for that

Agreed to maybe be one of the local trans support group facilitators but today is one of those days where I feel real inappropriate for the role but it's okay bc I know it's just weird brain and am doing it anyway

Like obvs it's very intentionally meant to be tragic drama but w the transmisogyny last season & the queer/trans coded character in Olaf's troupe & the whole circus fr**k arc it is super uncomfortable to watch sometimes

‪Hit me with your reckons on netflix's unfortunate events & how they emphasise olaf and co's badness with legit bigotry bc idk how I feel ‬

This whole thing is a mess and I haven't been active enough to follow it closely but a) that nb take was a mess b) we absolutely do consider each other more disposable than we should c) while I absolutely don't know enough about the blocking case in general social exclusion in queer communities is really problematic

well I saw the wt take and wow that sure is. an opinion.

#introduction selfie: i just got new glasses! https://occult.camp/media/bpfG7wxZB3ksWytK4FI https://occult.camp/media/1njqkdmmjIObhDWmnTI

#introduction: I'm Jen, 23 from Ōtautahi, Aotearoa. I work at an #art gallery and run another pop up space where I #curate, I am also a #radio playlist curator & as such v into #music, tho mostly local/nz artists! I've just picked up playing and performing myself again & am in a queer gothy doomy band. Nb trans femme

hi hi! moved here from witches.town